Chapter Seven: So It Begins
Copyright © by J. Faith Kenney
The characters and events portrayed in this book are fictitious. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.
No part of this book may be reproduced, or stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without express written permission.
Another day at the Shelter where I barely have a chance to catch my breath. Everything is moving too fast around here, and I likewise barely have a chance to think, which is good for me right now. Any spare time I have, I spend wondering about Tess and how unbelievable it is that Lily has her.
Beep, beep. A second code for Ash’s checkup that I am already fifteen minutes late for. Oh, crap. Rounding the halls, I reach Ash’s room, where he waits patiently with his parents. Knocking softly on the doorframe gives me a chance to catch my breath and put the smile on my face.
“Come in.”
“Hello. How are you feeling today, Ash?” I ask.
“Good. It is a little scratchy still but not as bad as before. I haven’t scratched it at all, even though I really, really wanted to.”
“That is good,” I say, using the kid voice that I use with all my kid patients and elders. “Today I am going to check the stitches and surface around it.”
“Why?”
“All it is, is a simple checkup to make sure you are healing correctly. After this though, I will give you a lollipop. Does that sound good?”
He nods energetically with a big smile. I nod back to him before going to the side of his bed to start the examination. Ash has reached every little checkpoint in recovery. In fact, he is almost healed completely, but the incision and the main stitches will remain a scar.
The final test is a simple physical test, but not too much to pop anything out. We walk the halls, going at a slow but steady pace. Ash does excellently with everything. Just one more day before he will get released and allowed to go home with his parents.
I pull them aside to talk about his medication, which he will need to take twice a day. I also highly encourage them to go for a walk, not a run, with him while keeping a watchful eye on him. They nod agreeably, thanking me again.
Filling out Ash’s chart with the evidence right in front of me brings joy and puts a smile on my face. Ash is getting better and healing completely fine. At least something that involves me is going right and not falling apart right now.
Beep, beep. I expected to see an emergency code, but instead it’s a code from Carrie to meet her in her office. Closing the chart, I place it back on my assessment placement before heading to her office. I barely touch the doorframe as I knock, and Carrie looks up.
“Please come in and close the door behind you.”
I do what I am told to do before taking a seat, my legs shaking. Carrie doesn’t smile at me, which is not normal. It sets my nerves on end, making my legs shake harder. Her face is filled with sorrow, sending panic through my veins. My throat goes dry, and I try my best to keep my face from breaking.
“Thela, you really are one of the best Caretenders I have, which is what’s making this so much harder to say. I want to start by off saying this is not my choice, and I would change it in a heartbeat if I could, but sometimes even the Administrator of The Helping Care Shelter has to do hard things that I really have no control of.”
“I don’t understand. What you are saying?” My voice thin but full of confusion.
“I, um-” Carrie’s voice breaks. Her eyes dart to her hands on her desk, picking at something or maybe nothing at all. She looks back to me for a second before back to her hands and desk. Carrie takes a deep breath, placing her hands in her lap and looking me straight in the eyes with grief. “Thela Brown,” she says, her voice shaking, “I have to release you. You are no longer a Caretender who works for The Helping Care Shelter. I am still going to pay you for this week, though.”
Carrie pulls out an envelope from her drawer, placing it on the table and sliding it over to me. I don’t pick it up. I don’t care about the money. Looking at Carrie with confusion, not comprehending what she just told me. I have been released. My mind states it over and over slowly before what that means finally clicks. I am released from The Helping Care Shelter, and I am no longer a Caretender here.
“Why?” I breathe out, my throat getting tighter with tears.
Carrie lifts the bottom of her laptop up to get the piece of paper underneath it. She looks at it. rereading it with a sad, heavy sigh before stretching out her arm to me. With shaky hands, I take the folded note and read it myself.
Thela Brown is the person to blame for Tess’s disappearance. I order her to be released, not fired from The Helping Care Shelter.
The bottom is signed with the seal of higher power of our government—the people with money. It is a simple seal of red, with gold shimmering in the word Techtender, and the initials L. B. in capital letters. Under the seal in smaller font than the eyes can read is an explanation why this person has power. Tears drop onto the note in my lap, and my throat is trying to hold back more tears.
“I am so sorry, Thela,” whispers Carrie, her voice incredibly thin.
“I-” My voice not my own anymore. “I understand.” Tears steadily stream down my face.
It feels like I am the lost little girl in the woods again. Again the same person gets to dictate what happens to me and has the finally say for how my life will turn out. My life feels like it was free until now, but now I know whatever happens to me, it will always be her say on how I live my life. My fate is in her hands.
I get up and leave Carrie’s office, leaving the Shelter in tears. I don’t call Zac to pick me up, but I walk the same path we took to the blue house. This time it’s longer on foot with tears falling for each step there.
. . .
The house appears as I reach the top of the hill. With each step I take, it feels like my feet are made of quicksand, each step slower than the last. When I reach the blue house, the stairs creak, and flashes of my parents sitting on the porch and laughing goes through my mind. The wind is blowing through the empty house, echoing as the front door opens.
This feels so familiar, like it was only yesterday I was here as a little girl.
Everywhere I turn, it looks the same as the last time I was here, still oddly perfect. This house was designed for a family with its big backyard for the kids to play. A house made for a family, but couldn’t keep a family.
Tears start to stream down my cheeks as I walk around. The memories I’ve retained pop up, making the house seem even more perfect. Anger and sadness pump through my veins. A scream, or screams, gets stuck in my throat with each turn I make.
The living room is the most destroyed, but oddly enough, it is the room that looks exactly the same to me, making me want to scream more. A television hangs on a crumbling brick mantel with a fireplace below. The mantel is in front of the sectional couch separating the living room from the rest of the house. Two cracked windows that look like they will fall out at any time are beside the mantel.
Glass, dust, dirt, leaves, and dead bugs that were trying to seek shelter lie on the wooden floor. I look down and see a photo right by my foot under all the crap. Hesitantly, I bend down to pick up the photo, and the screams in my throat scrape it.
The photograph is a picture of the three of them smiling and hugging like a happy family. Lily is on our dad’s shoulders while my mom smiles at both of them. A rock is not too far from my foot, and I pick it up, throwing it at one of the windows. It shatters into a million pieces, as hot, angry tears stream down my face.
I rip the photo in my hands into a million pieces just like the window. Whatever heavy object I can find, or the left knickknacks mocking around me, I throw them. At the wall, at the window, at whatever. Over and over again, not caring if I destroy this perfect little blue house. Sadness is gone and anger is seething with each breaking noise.
“AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!” screaming with the rage that boils under my skin. “Is this what you want, Lily! Take me, kill me, stop playing this game! You already ruined my life once, and now please ruin it again.”
I take a few steps closer to the window and the old glass on the floor. My back and my head slump back to the wall before I slide down onto the cold wooden floors. Sobbing, holding my knees close to my chest.
How far will she take this? I found out who you are, and I know you are watching me. Just please take me already. Stop playing this game on people who have nothing to do with this.
“If you want me, just take me.”
Lily is the real monster, not me. She is the one who broke what used to be a family.
The back door opens, and my sobs stop as my blood turns to ice. I am up on my feet in an instant and running to the front door.
“Who is in here?” calls a man, getting closer to me.
This time Zac is not here to save me, but the only thing on my mind is the door.
“Hey, you better-”
I am out and running up the hill, getting the hell out of that place, not knowing who that man is. I keep running even when my heart pounds in my chest and my lungs scream for air. Tears stream down my cheeks with even more coming.
. . .
The door closes behind me as I walk into Zac’s apartment. Zac comes out of the kitchen with a smile as I fall against the door, letting everything that happened today sink in.
“Thela, are you-” His smile falls as he takes a few steps closer to me.
“I got released today,” I say, cutting Zac off with no expression in my voice. The tears that were pouring stain my cheeks, but my eyes are dry now. Sweat makes my warm honey beige skin sticky, with my hair all flyaways. “Then I visited my childhood house, which made it much worse.”
“Sorry, Thela, but why did you go there and how?”
“I walked- well, ran. I went there because it was a place where I felt safe a long time ago. I went there because the note that got me released from The Helping Care Shelter came from Lily.”
“What are you talking about?”
I pull out the crumbled note and hand it to him to read. He reads it a couple of times, his face twisting with focus like it was when we were at the blue house for the family.
“She really wants to ruin my life,” I say, taking a step closer to him.
“She wants the power of owning a Neuroner. I don’t know what that means, to use me for testing or even kill me.”
“Hey, no, I am not going to let that happen to you. I will be there with you every step of the way.” He closes the gap between us, looking me in the eyes with a look of protection, of understanding.
“Okay, but there are chances you will get hurt, maybe even killed.” My voice thin as tears rise up. “But promise me one thing.” He nods and a single tear falls. “You will be careful, and you will not die saving or helping me. Zac you cannot die.”
He pulls me in for a hug as more tears fall. We both hold each other tightly, not letting go.
“Yes, if you promise the same.” Zac’s head tilts, his lips right above my ear.
All I can do is shake my head in his chest, holding on to him tighter. We stay there for hours, holding each other while not saying a word.
🧠
It’s cold with a breeze making it feel ten degrees colder than what it actually is. The sun is setting on a cloudy day with the moon never popping up. The blue house comes into view like it is now—destroyed. The steps creak and the door opens like in a haunted house, but the insides look new, not a single speck of dust in sight.
This is not my memory. I didn’t live here at this time.
“Lily, hurry up, the movers are waiting!” I turn my head to see my dad.
He is thin, not that tall for a man, with brown hair and crystal blue eyes just like mine. My face is his face, and it’s very obvious I am his daughter. We both have the same jawline with the same long, round face. My face along with my lips are thinner than his with more of a light rosy red tint to them. My nose is slimmer to fit my face perfectly, while his fits his face perfectly as well. His skin is pure golden brown, darker than mine and Lily’s.
“I am coming, Dad,” says younger Lily, coming down the stairs with a suitcase in her hands.
He goes to the bottom of the steps and grabs her suitcase out of her little hands. “Are you all ready?”
“Yeah. Why do we have to leave? Just because Thela left, why do we?” asks Lily.
My dad turns a little pale, panic striking his face at the mention of my name. “We are leaving for a fresh start. Too many memories pop up wherever me and mom turn. Now, Lily, never mention her name ever again. Not to me, Mom, or anyone at school. If anyone asks you if you have a sister, you say no, or if anyone asks if you know a Neuroner, you also say no.”
“But that is lying.”
“It is, but do it anyway. This is the lie you are allowed to tell in your life, okay?”
“Okay, Daddy.”
He grabs her hand as they walk out of the house like I am not even there. I am not here, I remind myself, pursing my lips together and holding back the tears. My eyes close for a second, but a second is all it takes for the house to change to what it looks like now.
Everything is silent, not even the birds or insects making any noise. I look around the similar place and take a few steps forward down the hall leading to the back door. My steps halt and my legs turn to jelly.
Lily—younger Lily—sits in front of the door, holding her knees and crying. She wasn’t there a second ago. “Why did you do this to us?” she asks, looking right into my soul.
No words can come as I look around, confused.
“Yeah, I am talking to you. You are a monster who destroyed this family.” She gets up from the ground. “You hurt people.” Her voice thin with tears, but fierce. “You don’t deserve to be a Caretender, trying to help people, because in the end you will just hurt them.”
“I didn’t do this.” My voice slows as I take a couple of steps forward. “You did this, you’re the monster not me.”
“I am not the one who is a Neuroner. People literally kill you because of it. Besides you couldn’t even save your very first patient.”
Tess. “You took-” Before I can finish, she runs out the back door.
I run behind her. But when I go through the back door, there is a dark room with Tess sitting on the cold floor. Her hair is messy and greasy. Her arm has a big gash like someone used a dull knife to press on her skin until it broke. She is sickly pale, her breath heavy. I reach out to touch her, and she is ice cold.
Tess looks up to me with so much pain. “Thela, I am so scared. They have you, and you are going to die. Run Thela, before it is too late.”
“What?”
“RUN! THEY ARE COMING.” Something pulls Tess away, and darkness fills the room.
My chest heaves, panicky fear filling my veins, my blood, clouding my every thought. With each breath I take, it feels like the air is draining, making it harder to breathe. My whole body shakes with fear, and my head grows lighter from the lack of oxygen. I fall, hitting the ground.
My eyes open to pure darkness. A light switching on causes my eyes to readjust as I sit up. On the other side of the darkness is Zac’s bedroom. Zac looks out his window and sets something down on his dresser. Another man comes out of the bathroom with a gun in his hand, pointing right at Zac.
“Zac!” I scream out with fear, but he doesn’t hear me.
Zac turns to the man, but before he can do anything to defend himself, the man fires the gun. BANG!
My blood stops flowing, but my heart starts racing. I am screaming for Zac without even realizing it. He falls to the floor, the wound creating a pool of blood. He got shot on the right side of the chest, closer to his stomach, maybe between two ribs.
“ZAC!” I try to run up to him, but an invisible force like glass holds me back. “Zac, please you promised not to die. ZAC!”
Banging on the invisible glass with all my might. It starts to creak, and I bang on it harder, making it break faster. With just enough space for me to get through, I rush to Zac’s side, applying pressure with the blanket I grab.
“Zac, stay with me. You can’t die today.” He moans with pain, and I can’t tell if this is real or a nightmare. “ZAC, ZAC!” Screaming at the top of my lungs as his chest stops moving.
My vision blurs and I fall right beside Zac into his blood.
🧠
Waking up, gasping for air, my lungs fill with air as I sit straight up. It takes a couple of minutes to calm down, and a smile curls my lips as I laugh. Just a dream, it is not real. Zac’s alive. Lying back down, I let my breaths climb down to normal. My eyes close and everything is peaceful.
BANG! The same sound from the dream and I am up in an instant, trying to open the door with my hands shaking, fumbling with the doorknob. After what feels like days, the door opens, and my blood stops pumping, but at the same time thieving through my veins.
“Zac, Zac, Zac!” I shout louder each time with my throat getting tighter.
There is no response. The apartment is dead silent. Panic and fear pumps through me with adrenaline that I do not want to have. As soon as I open Zac’s door, I see the pool of blood. There lies Zac in the same spot on the floor with the same wound. He mumbles with the pain, blood coating him and the floor.
I try to run up to him, but someone grabs a hold of me and forces my elbows to each other. Struggling, trying to get free to help Zac, I fight with all my might, but the person is stronger and taller than me.
My attention gets cut short as someone comes out of the bathroom, clapping slowly, making the only noise. “Wow, what a show we have here.” It’s a voice I instantly recognize.
The moonlight hits her just right to reveal her brown hair with brown matching eyes and her warm honey beige skin just like mine—like our mother. Her face is round like mine, but other than that her face screams our mom. She wears black leather pants with a black shirt under the maroon leather jacket. She stops a few inches away from Zac, showing her short frame, a few inches taller than my height.
“Lily?” My voice weak with confusion.
“Hi, little sister, or should I say Thela? It took you long enough to figure out who I am, and to be honest, I am surprised you recognize me after all these years.”
Zac releases another groan of pain. I look down to him with my fear spiking back up. “You’re going to kill him!” I shout, letting my angry nerves shine. “Please just take me, but let me save him.”
Lily meets my eyes with a little smile, and I try to escape the hold on my elbow but I can’t. “I’m not going to kill him if you come with me and do everything I say.” Her voice just above a threatening whisper.
I don’t need to look at Zac to see him pleading with his eyes not to do this. “Fine, anything. Just don’t let him die.”
“Good, Thela,” she says, talking to me like I am her dog. Better get used to it. She nods her head. “Cuff the boy and don’t let him die. After all, we made a promise to our guest of honor, my baby sister Thela.”
I don’t feel like a guest of honor. The person holding me shoves me to the door, not losing his grip on me. Two others in maroon coats with the symbol of an L with a circle on each side on the back come in. The rest of their clothes are black. One holds me by my elbows, while two hold up Zac. He mumbles something.
They drag all of Zac’s lean, bulky, muscular form out first, and I hold back the tears, trying not to show any more weakness. Lily gets right in my face with a pure powerful smile of joy.
“After all these years, finally the day has come that I am your owner. From now on, you are my pet.”
She backs away slowly with a smile that makes my stomach turn. Lily waves her hand, and the man holding me pushes me out the door of the apartment and into a white windowless van just like the one they took Tess in.